_Finding moments to encourage independence has proven to be very crucial in the creation of a good day for Curtis. This fall Curtis began to regress a bit in his independence. He would voice that he did not feel safe in his environment without me there either while I was taking a lunch break, using the bathroom or running down the hall to get some water. He was disinterested in solo bathroom trips, water breaks and walks in the hall.
This slip in his independence did not worry me too much. I knew that a similar story was playing out at home and I have two years of independent moments I could use to remind him of his progress. Considering he had a new room, a new teacher, new friends around him, a new hallway, a new schedule and a new set of expectations - he was taking on quite a bit and if a little regression in his independence was the result, I was going to be patient with that.
However, by mid fall his lack of independence started to affect his everyday mood. By nature, Curtis likes to do many things solo so this new need for someone to always be right by his side was starting to internally upset him - I could tell. Curtis, like most of us, wants to be independent. He is at his best at school day when he is feeling proud and self-sufficient - with a plan in place, but room for spontaneity.
I felt I needed to push him back toward self directed behavior - the days were getting too clingy and too emotional for this poor kid. I started the process with little steps (having him walk four tiles ahead of me in the hall, taking a short cut to the bathroom and myself taking the longer way, sitting across the circle from him at morning meeting instead of right next to him, etc). For all of these beginner steps I was there with him, but with some distance. Once he adapted well to those steps, I re- introduced (much like I did for him in kindergarten) the idea of taking a peer to the bathroom with him, instead of myself. Always a "safe peer", but that way it was social and it was without me present.
He was hesitant to do this - as I was no longer in the actual picture but he is (currently) slowly warming up to this idea. My lunch breaks are front-loaded every day on a sticky note on his desk (what's expected, when, the times I will be gone, who he can look towards for help etc). He fights my lunch breaks every day but, again, this is even a small step in increasing his desired behavioral goal of independence. In any given day, Curtis has a lot of support from people who would do anything for him, with him and because of him - however I am finding that little injection of solo "adventures" and independent tasks are equally as beneficial for him in getting to a place of producivity (socially or academically). When Curtis feels independent - he glows with pride and happiness. That is a sight that those who work with him are constantly seeking.

Caron, 1:1 School Support